Then it hit me. The world without my boys around me - arguing, griping, complaining, singing, laughing, and just being boys. I missed them. I missed their antics, their smart comments. I cried every night for a week straight. My eyes stayed swollen and my heart broke hard. I wanted my boys back, and there was little I could do about it all.
The fighting between us had become unbearable, and inappropriate before the boys. We had grown completely apart, and our worlds collided more than they coexisted. It was better that I stay away than cause heartache and hardship on the boys. My heart melted; I wore the first ring my son every bought me around my neck so that he was always with me. He called often, texted, messaged me on Facebook. I smiled when I saw his name on the phone while my heart lept for joy.
Then came the day for me to move back in. I walked around the corner of his bedroom oh so quietly. He looked up, and the happiest of joyous faces came to him. He stood fast and ran to my arms, hugging me tightly. "Welcome home mom," he said as a tear ran down my cheek. He held me close, his heartbeat racing hard and happily. He smiled for the rest of the day. The other boys came out, hugging me tightly, asking if I needed help unloading my things.
As the past month has rolled by, I have had a lot of time to think to myself. I took some seriously needed me time, and thought of ways to change my attitude and my opinions. When all was said and done, I knew that the best thing I could do was to continue being the best mom I knew how to be, and continue writing of course.
Now that many of you know, I am very happy to announce my engagement to a man who has opted on his own accord to step in and fill a very large pair of shoes. To be a father to my boys, and a husband to me is more than any woman could ask for.
But don't think for once my rainbow has changed.... All that and more in the next blog of Where oh Where Have I been coming s